E-P-ist Millionaire Seeking Wife! ch. 3

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"What is Millicent doing here?" Mildred Alfreda Zukiger stood in front of her son's big chair in one corner of the partners' office. She turned toward her son, who was standing in front of his desk. Today, she was the business-savy socialite mother, not-quite-platinum hair coiffed in a mature style, but not too mature, nicely made-up, but not overdone, faux business suit with slacks instead of skirt, business heels, just enough natural jewelry to show she had money to back up her opinions.

JD turned and stared out the corner office windows at the roofs of the neighboring buildings. The sun had cleared the horizon, and the city was brought into sharp relief in the post-dawn light. "Ah, that. Sherry hired her as her personal secretary yesterday. Don't know if I'd call this view beautiful or not, but I guess it's impressive." He turned his thoughts heavenward, in a silent plea for strength and wisdom.

"You don't need the work ...," Mildred turned towards Millie, seated in the stenographer's chair between the two partners' desks.

JD reflected a moment on Millie's carefully crafted appearance. She had done herself over, too, auburn hair in a tight bun, severe, trim makeup, conservative business suit with knee-length skirt. She looked every inch the part of a professional secretary.

And it was not just appearance. She was quite overqualified. Although the job she had left for the courting was way beyond secretarial, she had had several years of experience as an executive secretary prior to the career change.

If the arrangement were a normal hire, they'd be getting an excellent deal in more ways than one. But she was here for reasons other than money.

Millie broke role with a grin and a nod. "True, but I think I need the job." And then she returned to role.

Well-placed misdirection. If he wanted to learn how to manipulate people, Millie would be a good teacher. He spared a few cycles for a question heavenward that never seemed to be answered, whether he needed to cultivate those skills that his mother so highly valued.

"JD's mother furrowed her brow and tilted her head inquisitively. "So what is Sherry doing here?"

"Sherry is my business partner, and this billboard thing is not likely to leave the business unscathed. She has a right to veto any plans that could damage the business." He turned to face his mother. "Oh, and thank you for having covers put over those three billboards you put up yesterday without consulting the rest of the team. Where's Dad?"

Mildred was taken even more aback. "Your father?" She shook her head. "Oh, he wouldn't be interested."

JD got his phone out of his pocket and pulled up his father's page in the contacts. Karl Mulhaus Zukiger answered almost as soon as he pressed the contact button.

"Good morning, Dad." JD looked at the wall.

"Not much, yet. Yes she is." He looked at his mother, whose expression showed growing disbelief.

"Just having a meeting of the team in Sherry's office." He looked at Jenny, seated with the rest of the team that his mother had assembled at the portable table they had brought in for the conference, and raised his eyebrows. "Yeah, that team."

Jenny shrugged. "Go for it," she mouthed silently.

"Not really. No, wait." He nodded at Sheliah. "I guess I should be more appreciative of Sheliah's efforts. The billboard thing."

"E-P-ist Millionaire seeking wife." He looked out the window, then back at his mother. "Yeah, that's us. Didn't Mom tell you?"

Mildred's expression turned dark. "I tell him what he needs to know."

JD rolled his eyes toward the ceiling and smiled sardonically. "Haven't heard the full plan yet. " He blinked slowly. "Yeah, something about having a contest to marry me off." He started chuckling. "Uh huh, you heard that right. And she didn't seem to think I needed to know, either."

He looked over at Sherry, who seemed to be enjoying the drama from her vantage point perched on her desk. "Yeah, I sure would like you to be here, Dad." Sherry and JD exchanged a grin.

Sherry was her usual self, as much a female software geek as he was a male software geek. Comfortably round, dishwater blonde hair, ordinary features, no makeup, comfortably dressed in slacks. She was probably the one person on the planet he figured he would always be comfortable with. And the one person he would never expect his mother to be comfortable with, although that was also somewhat beside the point. Again he queried God on the forbidden subject, and the answer was, as always, closed to him.

He glanced at Millie, who nodded in encouragement. "Okay, we'll wait until you get here." And he closed the connection.

"Well, are you going to invite the whole neighborhood?"

"Mom? Dad is family."

"And what about Ron?"

Ronnie looked up from her seat at the second stenographer's desk near the door, tablet terminal at the ready for notes and research.

"I wanted my personal lawyer, and the company legal staff, too, checking our plans. George couldn't make it this early on the short notice, but Ronnie is here representing company legal. Thanks, Ronnie."

"Sure."

"And George will be coming within an hour."

"Well of course I'll have my lawyer check the plans." JD's mother stopped short of sniffing.

"So our legal staff can discuss their concerns with Hank on an informed basis. Where is he, by the way?"

"I think he's busy. But ... we don't need to be taking their very valuable time just to listen to us haggle over details, do we?"

Ronnie tilted her head and raised her eyebrows. "Well, Mildred, I would agree about the use of time, but it can often help when starting a new project, especially an unusual one like this, to have some legal oversight. It will probably save time later."

JD's mother gave Ronnie an icy stare.

He reflected for a moment on his mother's unwillingness to be on the losing side of an argument, and, appreciatively, on the significant wisdom of bringing legal in early.

"Well, since we're waiting for Dad, maybe we should wait for Hank and George, too. How about we postpone this meeting until six o'clock, and call Hank to see if he can make it?"

Sherry pulled her lips slightly to the right, before speaking with a wry grin. "We're here. Call him up, but we can go back over anything important when they get here. Let's hear what your team has done and what they have in mind."

"Surprisingly, Sherry and I are in agreement on getting started."

JD looked from Sherry to his mother, then shrugged. "Okay, Mom."

He stepped to the window again, thumbed through the directory and made connection. "Ah, Hank, good morning. Yeah, my Mom should be the one calling." He paused, listening. "Well, I have a favor I'd like to ask. Mom and Sheliah came up with a rather odd-ball scheme to have a bunch of women apply to be my wife." Another pause. "Yes, Sheliah the matchmaker. Uh huh, those billboards." He grinned and chuckled. "We are in a meeting to talk about it now."

He looked over at Sheliah and winked with the eye his mother wouldn't see. She smiled back and nodded.

"Oh, thank you. We all appreciate the sacrifice." He turned to his mother and gave her a thumbs-up. She frowned in reply.

"Yeah, we're waiting to get into the deep nitty-gritty until my dad makes it. Mmm hmm. Yeah. Thanks. Dressed for golf is fine, and give my apologies to your other client. See you in a few." And he hung up.

"Okay, he should arrive within a half-hour."

General murmurs of approval could be heard, with the noticeable exception of his mother.

"So, Shel, can you outline your plan? Then we can hear how my mom wants to change it." He went to one wall and pulled back a curtain, revealing a whiteboard covered with data flow diagrams and module relationship charts. "Ah. We took a picture of this, right, Sherry?"

"Yeah."

"Good." He picked up an eraser from the chalk tray.

Millie jumped up and took the eraser from his hand and started clearing the whiteboard. Sherry started to stand, but JD looked at his empty hand and took the other eraser from the tray and worked from the other end, so she sat back down.

His mother watched with an expression of disapproval, but said nothing.

Sheliah stood. "I should be doing that."

"Almost done. Thanks, Millie."

Millie nodded, put the eraser back, and sat back down as Sheliah moved to the whiteboard.

JD handed her a marker and eraser and stepped back. "I think you were saying to someone that it wasn't a contest."

"Right. I was brainstorming with Jenny and the rest of the team a couple of days ago, and Mark said he thought one at a time was a little slow. And things just kind of went from there to comparing finding you a wife to filling a job opening." She raised her hand. "Now, wait, I know you won't appreciate that."

"Got that right."

"But if you're going to be searching for a needle in a very large haystack, you could have the haystack come to you."

"If the king won't go to the haystack, the haystack should come to the king. Not one of my favorite sayings, but go on."

"Not really much. We started with the idea of a classified ad, but Jessie pointed out that we'd miss at least half of the sort of women we are looking for with that."

JD looked over at his physical trainer, and he nodded back.

"Guess I can see that."

"So we were thinking of a large ad on a business magazine site and in news aggregators that cater to the financial industry and software industries, as well as E-P-oriented academic journal sites. But we weren't thinking about billboards."

"No." JD gave it a mental nod.

Mildred defended herself. "Of course I want to reach the E-P-ist population more than any other. Billboards in this state should help."

"That's actually reasonable, Mom."

"Thank you." There was ice in her voice.

"So," Sheliah continued, "I had something like this in mind."

She wrote on the board,

Well-off E-P-ist male CEO seeking wife.
Interested parties, send us a short personal history without name or identification, and a paragraph describing your reasons for interest at <ep.ceo@epmatchmakers.com.uis>.
We will contact you with results within 5 days.
E-P-Matchmakers is committed to protecting the privacy of all inquiries.

"Nice." Sherry voiced her approval.

JD pursed his lips and nodded agreement. "Low-key, not asking too much information, keeping it as anonymous as possible."

Millie took a picture of the board.

JD looked around at her. "Thanks, Millie."

Sheliah began erasing the board.

"Well, I think it's completely too low-key."

"Hang on, Mom. So what was the plan from there, Sheliah?"

Sheliah wrote more on the board.

1. Matchmakers review.
2. More complete information about JD, still no identification.
3. On submitter's agreement, give it to JD to review.
4. If JD agrees, reveal identities.
5. If both agree, arrange a first date.

"We'd review what we get. If it didn't pass, we'd give a polite refusal. If it did, we'd tell them a little more about you, and if they were interested, we'd pass it on to you. If you were interested, then we could tell them who you are and tell you who they are. From there, negotiation on dating could begin."

"No reason to involve JD at any ... until step 5, really. I can do the pre-scanning and initial negotiation."

"Thank you for volunteering, Mom, but I would prefer to handle that myself under this scenario."

Millie took another picture, and Sheliah thanked her.

Mildred's face was a mask of displeasure. "I want you to be happy, Joe Dear. I would not choose anyone wrong for you."

JD glanced from Sherry, who just raised her eyebrows, to Millie, who blinked slowly without revealing her thoughts, to Jenny, who also raised her eyebrows, then tilted her head. Not getting any direction from them, he continuing to look around the room for a moment, then focused on a corner of the ceiling and prayed again for guidance.

"Well, it definitely won't happen that way, Mom."

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Copyright 2019 Joel Matthew Rees

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Backed up here: https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/05/bk-jdz-millionaire-03..html.

E-P-ist Millionaire Seeking Wife! ch. 2

(Previous)

"So," Carrie, one of the network engineers, commented between bites of afternoon-break pizza, "judging from your mom's putting on an appearance this morning, things did not go well with Millicent last night?" She looked nothing if not pleased.

JD glanced over at Sherry. She was concentrating on the pizza, not offering any help. Concerning most of the women he had dated, even before his mother had decided she had to take a hand, Sherry had been quite willing to weigh in, letting him know clearly where she thought the relationship would fall apart, and what dangers there would be in trying too hard to make it work. And her analysis was always spot-on.

His mother had often complained about Sherry's interference, but now her mother's team -- his team -- often consulted with Sherry. Over the last month, even Millie had come to confide and ask for advice a few times.

Concerning Millie, Sherry had been keeping her own counsel, which JD had taken as tacit approval.

Carrie cleared her throat. "Sorry for interrupting your thoughts."

JD shook his head. "No problem."

Greg, one of the sales crew, commented from the next table over, "Hey, some of us actually approved of Millie. But if she can't deal with a bit of cheering at the end of an opera, hey, ..."

"How is it everyone knows what happened? How many of you are doubling as spies for my mom?"

Laughter filled the lunchroom. Everyone knew JD was happy to have his friends among her spies, finding opportunities to run interference.

James leaned over. "Personally, I'm more than relieved. And I don't think I'm alone in wishing you'd tell you mother that her opinions can go down the river, and put this business in one family. Best friends make good marriages."

"If they can keep being best friends while negotiating the marriage. We agreed we didn't want to go there." JD avoided looking at Sherry.

"Neither of you think the other is ugly," Pat, their test lead, added her 2/100_sixteen hour-credits.

Sherry continued to concentrate on the pizza. There might have been a sardonic twitch in the corner of her mouth. "Millie is much better looking than I am. Don't worry about last night, guys. What happened is not what you think." And she picked up another slice.

JD frowned and wrinkled his nose. "Oh, give it a rest, Sherry. You know my opinions about looks."

Now she grinned broadly and threw the slice of pizza at his cheek, where it slapped flat and stuck. He peeled it off. grinned back, and took a bite. The lunch room erupted in cheers, just as the lunch room door opened and Millie stepped in, wearing jeans and a neutral color tee.

She came straight to the table where JD and Sherry sat. "Hi guys. Didn't know you'd taken to wearing makeup, JD. Sherry, I know it's kind of sudden, but could you make some time for me today?"

JD chuckled and grabbed his handkerchief to clean the cheese and tomato paste off his face. "My kind of makeup."

"It doesn't suit you." But she smiled.

Sherry joined JD's laughter. "Sure, Millie. 's now good for you?"

"It's not an interruption?"

"Nah. Save us some of the pizza, guys."

Most of the eyes in the room followed them as they disappeared into the corner office. JD sent his thoughts heavenward in hope something useful could come of the conversation.

---

About an eighth hour later, Sherry opened the door to the office and called out, "JD, your presence is required!"

JD, who was helping clean dishes in the company kitchen, responded with a "Yo! Take over James." He washed his hands in the sink, removed the apron and handed it to James, then headed to the corner office.

Millie was standing by the couch, looking pensive.

"I have to admit, I have rarely seen you in jeans -- and sans makeup. Nice." JD nodded approvingly.

"Thank you. Is that suit going to be salvageable? You do look more comfortable, though. Last night was a shocker."

"Probably. I'd rather be in jeans, but I didn't have any upstairs today. Shocker? How so?" JD sat down on a stool opposite the couch.

Sherry was sitting on the corner of her desk.

"Sherry has been kind enough to finally disabuse me of all sorts of misunderstandings."

"My mother's ideal vision of me."

"So I see. This whole last month we've both been negotiating around our mothers' fantasies."

"True about my mother. Your mother too?"

Millie nodded and grunted an "Mmm." in reply. "Getting to know each other through the filter of our mothers' ideals."

"Sorry to upset you by being so noisy last night."

She smiled wryly and sat down on the couch. "It was not you that I was upset at. If I had known how thoroughly your mother misrepresented you, I'd have been cheering with you. I thought you and she were testing me."

She looked quizzically at JD. He shook his head.

"Nah. It was a good performance. I hope you can forgive me for that."

"Nothing to forgive here. It was quite good."

There were several moments of silence.

"I need to know some things, so I can make a decision."

"Okay, shoot."

"This is the corner office." She waved at the well-apportioned office.

"It is. My mother said it couldn't go to anyone who was not a partner. After some discussion, Sherry said she'd take primary responsibility for it."

"Not mine so much as the partners' office, which we never use except for entertaining important people. It does have desks for both of us."

Millie sat straight. "I'm important?"

"We think so." JD nodded.

Millie's shoulders sagged a fraction. "And there it is. I've kind of felt it every time we've gone out, but now I'm sure."

"What?"

Millie thought for a moment. "Is it your mother keeping you two from getting married?" She looked back to Sherry and then again at JD.

JD held up his hand to stop her as he looked over at Sherry, who tilted her head to the right and pressed her lips together before speaking. "No," Sherry said.

JD put his hand down. "There are certain topics that are not allowed."

"I think I have Sherry's permission."

JD sighed. "In that case, my only answer is, I can't say."

Millie looked back to Sherry, who ducked her head apologetically.

"You two are best friends from childhood."

"True."

"If I were to marry into this relationship, I'd have to accept being the tacit second wife."

"We don't have sex, you know," JD said, somewhat apologetically. "Sex is hard on friendship."

"Sherry told me so several weeks ago, and I think I believe both of you."

"And it isn't just us in the equation." JD continued. "If we let our friendship get messed up, it could easily destroy the business. The company isn't really stable yet, and you can't push a business to grow faster and become stable, just for the convenience of the partners and board of directors."

"Third wife." Millie laughed ruefully. "I'm going to give your mother a piece of my mind."

"It's really not her fault," Sherry said quietly.

There was another short minute of silence.

JD broke it. "I guess, then, even though last night was not the argument I thought it was, we won't be seeing each other any more."

Both Sherry and JD looked a little disappointed.

"I didn't say that. And I will be very interested to watch what happens with this 'E-P-ist millionaire seeks wife' campaign."

"What? How did you know about that? Sheliah just suggested it to me this morning."

"There's already at least one billboard up on the highway." Millie grinned.

"Mom!" JD patted his pocket. "Where's my phone?" He turned and ran out of the office, with Sherry's and Millie's laughter chasing him.

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Copyright 2019 Joel Matthew Rees

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Backed up at https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/05/bk-jdz-millionaire-02.html.

E-P-ist Millionaire Seeking Wife!

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Joseph Daniel Zukiger looked at the pimple-faced reflection in the mirror and sighed. Six months spending half of every working day with a nutritionist, a physical trainer, a personal coach, a hair stylist, a dermatologist, and an image specialist to clean up all his social bumps, and one full day back on the job had wrought havoc on all that had been accomplished.

He examined his teeth, running his tongue over the unbrushed enamel, then looked at the toothbrush hanging on the cupholder.

Of course it wasn't the emergency five hour shift he had worked that had really wrought the havoc, nor was it the all-nighter debugging after. It was the opera in the evening, in between.

He checked the time on his cellphone, sitting on it's charger on the porcelain, and shook his head. Instead of the toothbrush, he reached for the cup and filled it with water.

The opera had been quite good, but the woman he had spent the last month courting, one Millicent Alfreda Porsche, had not appreciated his vocal appreciation of the cast and chorus's work.

He hadn't been the only one standing, whistling, calling out, "Bravo! Olé! Bis! Encore!"

He looked at the mouthwash on the shelf and shook his head at that, too. Some minty candy flavor Millie said she liked when she gave it to him. Cup to mouth, mouthful of plain tap water, swish it around.

She had been quite put out with him, not even willing to discuss how good the opera was, much less whether the performance was good enough for him to cheer so vocally. Opera is apparently not a football game.

He spat into the sink.

The (very expensive) dinner after and the chauffeured trip to her apartment had been an exercise in arctic exploration. He had assumed she had been attempting to pressure him to apologize for the scene he had made, and promise not to repeat it. What else was there to assume? She would hardly respond to any of his attempts at conversation.

Tom, who had taken chauffeur duties yesterday, was no help either. Just grinned and shook his head any time he had caught his eye in the rear-view mirror. None of the people at his company really wanted to encourage his mother's schemes.

And his usual resort for help, silent prayer, had been answered with a "You figure it out yourself."

Something inside him had stuck. Opera was the rock concert of a bygone era, and opera in the old world was often a raucous affair, not the staid high-brow social staring contest that many in the Union of Independent States seemed to think it was. If he wanted to show his appreciation the traditional way, he was not going to let any woman tell him not to.

He repeated with another mouthful of tap water.

His knew his mother had spies in the audience, in the five-star restaurant they had gone to after, and even watching outside Millie's apartment. Shoot. He knew half of them. He knew Millie was aware of them as well.

Millie had pointedly not invited him inside, and he thought they had both been relieved at being able to call it an evening.

Rather than returning to his own apartment where his mother and his personal coach were waiting to analyze the entire evening, he had told Tom to bring him back to work, calling his mother from the car to tell her that he really needed to give his company and the people he worked with his attention. It had taken a full eighth of an hour to convince his mother that his business really was a higher priority than analyzing a disastrous date.

At the office, he had joined his core technical staff, diving into the bug that he had left half-fixed to go on the date. With his business partner and CTO, Sherry van der Velt, in charge, they had made significant progress while he was gone.

And they had fixed it together -- at some cost to his complexion and his suit, and, temporarily, his health. He hoped the others were faring better than he was. Pausing, he offered a quick prayer of gratitude for the successful bug-squelching session and for everyone's health. He had thought Sherry was looking a little haggard, too, when she headed for the elevator.

He supposed he felt some disappointment about the evening, but also sympathy for all the specialists his mother had hired -- and for the frustrated professional matchmaker, too.

Looking over at the water cooler with its tank of cooled, pure organic mineral water from an old-world alpine range, he filled the cup from the sink again and took a long drink. And reached his thoughts out in prayer about Millie and about his attempts to find a spouse.

And his thoughts returned to him again.

Mostly he was disappointed for his mom. She had so many expectations and none of them were coming to fruition. She wanted grandchildren, and what she had was a pimply, socially awkward, single adult son with a successful business and enough profits safely invested away to retire and live comfortably for the rest of his life -- as long as the economy didn't suddenly go belly-up. And a son's business partner whom his parents, well, his mother, anyway, detested.

His parents hadn't wanted the new house or the new car he had offered. Of course. They had no need of such things from him. Although he had become independently successful, he was not one who had started from a family in poverty -- or even in the middle class.

Now they wanted grandkids and a pedigreed daughter-in-law. Sometimes he wasn't so sure that his mother would be averse to taking them in that order, either.

For himself, he thought he wasn't that disappointed. One more gold-digger retired.

Hand on the faucet, he paused again. Maybe he was disappointed. Millie wasn't really a gold digger, even though money seemed to be far more important in her world than it was in his. He rinsed the cup and put it back.

He actually thought he liked Millie, and even felt more than a little sympathy for her. Of the women Mom had tried to set him up with, he had found her the most acceptable so far.

But he was much more comfortable with letting all his personal bumps, edges, and awkwardnesses show in his personal relationships. And his opinion, not well accepted with his mother, was that any woman who would be persuaded by all his artificial changes would be a woman he would not want to spend a whole lot of time with, much less the rest of his eternities. If he ever made it to the place where Gods build worlds, he would be in the thick of the work, not trying to manage it from a safe, clean distance. And he was comfortable with his God's opinion of his opinion.

So he pealed off his suit and shirt, threw them over the back of the chair at the desk, set the alarm for 8:00 noon, and devoted a moment of appreciation to taking in the beautiful sunrise glinting off the rooftops below his window before he fell into bed. He wondered, briefly, whether Sherry had seen the sunrise too.

He was unconscious by the time he hit the mattress.

---

At an eighth-hour past noon, he walked into the office in his wrinkled suit, sans necktie, hair still moist from the six-minute shower, grinning and whistling "Let It Go". (Well, the lyrics would remind you of a song you may know by that name.) All the staff cheered. James, their office manager and chief of sales, returned his grin and said, "Welcome back, JD."

Sherry smiled broadly, if slightly blearily, and gave him a thumbs up. She also looked like she was running on less than three hours of sleep, although he thought she probably looked better than he did. 

The door opened behind him and the cheering suddenly faded. He stopped whistling and turned around, his shoulders slumping.

"Joseph, I am disappointed."

"Mom, --"

From behind her, Jenny, his personal coach, a cheerful dancer of modern dance, interrupted. "Sister Zukiger, I'm not sure this is even a setback."

More than once, he had entertained the wish that his personal coach were not already married.

"Quiet. I am taking charge now."

Something inside was rising, but he automatically suppressed it. Habit long in-grained took care of any rebellious thoughts.

From out in the hall, Sheliah, the matchmaker, said, "I think it's time for a new plan."

Without thinking, he responded, "Okay, what's your plan?"

In the sudden silence, he could have heard a feather drop, if his mother had worn one of her hats that shed feathers.

But she hadn't today.

She seemed to remember to close her mouth, and turned towards the door. "Yes. What's your new plan?" Surprisingly, her voice was neither querulous nor sarcastic. A collective sigh of relief could be felt, if not heard.

"Borrow from reality TV. Do it like a contest. E-P-ist millionaire seeking wife."

Mentally, JD put palm to forehead. But his mother had turned to face him again, raising an eyebrow. It looked like she wanted him to agree.

Behind her, Sheliah was nodding, with a conspiratorial smile and a finger to her lips. Jenny gave him a wink.

"Oh, whatever." He raised his hands in the air, shaking his head. "I need to make sure the bug we squashed a few hours ago will remain squashed, so all the rest of my training sessions this afternoon are cancelled, too. Everybody take the rest of the day off."

His mother stood, arms akimbo, frowning.

"Okay, Mom, tomorrow morning. Shel can tell us about her plan then."

His mother thought for a moment, then nodded decisively. "Five o'clock, sharp." Then she turned and left. "Come with me, girls." Jenny and Sheliah waved cheerfully and followed her.

He retired into the server room to check the last three hours' worth of logs, and Sherry joined him.

"Maybe all this training isn't going to waste. You stood up to your mother today."

"Sort-of."

"It's a good start. Look at all the transaction roll-back logs."

"What roll-back logs?"

"That's the point."

"Uh-oh, there should be some rollback in there after three hours' worth of business."

They dug in.

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Copyright 2019 Joel Matthew Rees

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(If you're wondering about the hours, there are sixteen hours in a day in this world, and 256_ten short minutes in an hour. But they count in hexadecimal. Clock noon is 8:00_sixteen.

Dawn usually occurs somewhere between three o'clock and a quarter past five, and it's early spring, so dawn is about a quarter before five, or about 4:C0_sixteen. That does mean hours are longer there than here, and minutes shorter. The common five-hour workday starts at 6:00_sixteen and ends at B:00_sixteen.)

This little fantasy was sparked by the person recently calling himself a Mormon  millionaire, proposing to find his wife by advertising on billboards and running what is essentially a reality-show type contest. There was a conversation about it on the FaceBook LDS Beta Readers group:

https://www.facebook.com/groups/475461645922698/permalink/1552836624851856/

When I first saw it, I shrugged and laughed. I felt no spark of inspiration, although several other members of the group did.

After it kept resurfacing in various feeds over the course of a day or two, the pan I don't remember putting on the back-burner in my mind boiled over, shoving several other projects out of the way, and I started a flash piece in the FB conversation, which I later copied to my Random Eikaiwa blog and cleaned up a bit:

https://joels-random-eikaiwa.blogspot.com/2019/05/e-p-ist-millionaire-seeking-wife.html

It looks like a novel is taking shape.

Copyright 2019 Joel Matthew Rees

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Backed up here: https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/05/bk-jdz-millionaire-the-campaign-idea.html

Water and Earth, Prologue, scene 13.90 -- Too Many Secrets

Previous: Ancestors

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"So, how do you like the skeletons in our closet?" Water Princess nudges Earth Prince with her elbow.

Earth Prince grins lopsidedly and tilts his head, then, instead of answering, reads from the monument in the old tongue. After a pause, he repeats it, translating. "In memory of a black sheep, of value to our God, if not his family." He looks at Water Princess and ducks his head. "And I said you wouldn't find anyone related here."

She grins in reply, playfully punching his arm.

Her mother murmurs, "Of value to his family. If only he'd known."

"I think he knows, Mom."

"Should I take some pictures? Your family will be interested."

Now Water Princess fixes Earth Prince with an inquiring look and a raised eyebrow.

"Woops. You're brothers will notice that there had to be someone else here and suspect something."

"Well, how about I take some pictures?" Her father holds up his hand-held terminal.

"And I'll be careful to stay out of the frame. I look forward to sharing a laugh about this with your brothers in a year." He laughs ruefully.

"Me too." She smiles wistfully and gives him a quick hug. "Thanks for being so understanding."

Water Princess and her mother stand beside the monument while her father takes a shot. Then he takes a closeup of the epitaph and dates and a few more shots of the rest of the gravesite while Earth Prince stands clear.

"Dad?"

"Yeah?"

"One timed shot with you and me and Mom. They'll expect it."

"Good idea. We can line up here again by Ilar's stone and put the terminal on that monument over there. Maybe our friends will cooperate and join us."

Water Princess looks around at the boars and snuffles and squeals to them, and the boars respond with snuffles and grunts, moving to gather around the monument.

"At least I can press the shutter button?" Earth Prince offers.

"Thanks. Could you set it up?" Her father hands him the terminal.

The three line up, Water Princess squatting down to give the old sow a caress. Earth Prince sets the hand-held on the other monument and frames the picture. Then he sets the timer and takes his hands off, backing away for the shot.

"Say 'watercress'!"

Water Princess and her parents grin and the boars squeal, and the terminal imitates the sound of a mechanical shutter.

The group picture taken, they take some final quick notes, gather their packs and notebooks, say goodbye to the boars, and leave the clearing.

Earth Prince holds some branches and vines aside for Water Princess's father. "I think I should ask you what kind of parameters you need on that secure channel before we get back to the shop."

The two exchange a look.

"Secure from what, is the problem," Earth Prince points out.

"You have listeners on your network?" Water Princess's father asks as he takes a turn clearing the way.

"Of course. In particular, two of our ministries tend to keep an eye on me. They'll notice an encrypted message. Will that be a problem?"

"Ah. I have a similar problem on the other end -- our international and internal intelligence offices. Sometimes it's convenient to have their attention, sometimes not so much."

"So what's your strategy?"

Now Water Princess holds vines and branches out of the way as she and her mother listen without comment.

"It's primarily a call home, a short status message to my sons and their reply. I'll be using steganography for the important details anyway. But I don't want certain other parties to know the status message has been sent, so I don't want to send it from the cottage we've rented."

"You'll send the message between the photos?"

"Right."

"Was that planned?"

"Side benefit of having a real reason to travel," Water Princess points out.

As the forest thins out, Earth Prince hangs back. "So you guys do a lot of walking to avoid the probability of a bugged car?"

"That's about right," Water Princess's mother confirms.

Water Princess stops and turns to Earth Prince. "While we're talking cloak and dagger, let's make a contingency password."

"I like telepathy, but it's not a good habit to get into relying on it. Hmm. How about my sugar issues for a flag topic?"

Water Princess thinks. "That could usually be worked into a conversation. Then, if we need to say something in code, we can start the message with something about water and end it with something about earth."

"Won't that be kind of obvious?"

"Obvious is less likely to draw attention. We can give a count after the mention of earth, with either an up or down word, so we know which words to pick out."

"Okay."

"Cloak and dagger!" her mother complains as they leave the forest.

---

Table of Contents

Next: Beryl

---

[JMR2019: Backed up here:
https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/05/bk-we-0-13-90-too-many-secrets.html
]

Water and Earth, Prologue, scene 13.80 -- Ancestors

Previous: Debriefing

Table of Contents

---

Earth Prince looks at the sun through the trees, then frowns and pulls out his hand-held communication terminal to check the time. "Now I've only got a half an hour before I have to head in to the shop to open up. Let's start copying."

As the four get their notepads out of their packs, Water Princess's father says, "Speaking of your shop, I need a secure connection today. Can I drop by later?"

"Sure."

Water Princess's mother suggests, "Can we just make a map, kind of get an idea of what's here today in the remaining time, then come back again when Ceri and Morris and maybe some of the other members of the ward can come with us?"

"Good idea." Earth Prince laughs. "We need to try to dispel the rumors about the odd things that happen here."

By unspoken agreement, the four of them spread out, checking stones here and there and taking quick notes.

"Shouldn't we just all go to your shop?" Water Princess asks as she takes notes.

"I'm not sure I can work with your dad immediately. I need to open up the shop, and there may be customers. But if you're willing to wait, why not?"

"While we're waiting, we can do some shopping at nearby stores."

"Good idea, Mom. I saw a divers' supply shop nearby that looks interesting."

"Divers' supply?" Her father doesn't look up.

"Have to use the ordinary means when they're available, right, Dad? My swimming goggles are getting old. But it'll be fun to look at the diving equipment."

A snuffling sound is heard, and they all look around. At the sight of a tusked, furry head poking into the clearing, Water Princess squats down and holds out her hand and snuffles in return, saying her thanks. The members of the sounder wander into the clearing and join them, and the four Xhilrans exchange snuffles, grunts and squeals with the members of the sounder.

One older sow brings a litter with her to introduce them, and then urges Water Princess over to a specific monument.

"Dad, look at this name. Ilar. It looks familiar."

Her father stands up and goes over to take a look, followed by her mom and Earth Prince. "Cheerful. That looks like the missing youngest son of your great-grandfather."

"Agnes and I are cousins."

"Probably so."

---

Table of Contents

Next: Too Many Secrets

---

[JMR2019: Backed up here:
https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/05/bk-we-0-13-80-ancestors.html
Expanded from here:
https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/04/bk-we-0-13-70-debriefing.html
Original back up here:
https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/03/bk-we-0-13-5-wild-boars.html
]

Water and Earth, Prologue, scene 13.70 -- Debriefing

Previous: To the Third  and Fourth Generation

Table of Contents

---

From within the forest, four wild boars watch the group of students and their teacher leave. As the group disappears around a bend, the amber gilt nuzzles the ebony boar's neck, and he nuzzles back. After a few nuzzles and nips, they back away, perhaps regretfully, grunting and sighing, then turn and snort to the other pair, who hesitate, then approach and join in nuzzling.

Shortly, four Xhilrans stand in the shade of the forest.

Earth Prince grins. "Nuzzling is fun."

Water Princess smiles shyly, looking down at the grass. "But staying in that form would be dangerous. I'm not sure I'd be able to control my, uhm, natural instincts."

"We changed back too soon?"

"Mom!"

"Animals have different rules." She pauses, then ducks her head in apology. "But we aren't animals. Sorry."

"Yeah. Much as I like your mom's ideas, I do agree with you, Dŵr. No." Earth Prince chuckles, and the four join in. He continues, "Just as well it's not yet rutting season."

"I shouldn't tease, honey. But I do like your new prince."

Earth Prince clears his throat.

Water Princess squeezes his hand while reaching out to give her mother a hug.

"Maybe we should go see what we can copy from the monuments and markers," Water Princess's father suggests.

Earth Prince looks at the position of the sun. "I've still got an hour."

(A sixteenth of a day. You would call it an hour and a half.)

The four head back into the woods, retracing their steps.

"Well, I think we did a good job."

"Thanks Mom. We need to thank the real boars, too, if we can find their sounder."

Earth Prince holds branches out of the way as the others pass. "Yeah. I was a bit worried about the methods, but this avoided the appearance of magic. That would have caused problems in this particular case."

Water Princess's father holds branches in turn. "I think at least two of their group are thinking there was magic involved."

The two men stop and nod to each other, then move on.

"Professor Parry." Earth Prince's expression turns a bit pensive. "She was one of my favorite teachers when I started the upper forms. She reached out to the students who didn't fit in."

Water Princess nods. "That must be disappointing. But I don't think she's a bad person. Just confused."

"Yeah, I think you're right. But I think I need to visit her."

観 -- That is correct. You do.

"She needs some  support. I'll go with you."

"If you need, we can too," Water Princess's mother suggests.

"Thanks." Earth Prince nods. "I'm not sure a crowd's a good idea, though."

使 -- Better not to have any parents on the first visit. And it will likely require more than one visit.

"Should I go alone the first time?"

助 -- Water Princess can help you.

"It's a date."

"But what if she calls me by name? Or asks yours?"

Water Princess pauses in her progress, and looks back to Earth Prince. "Maybe I'll have to give up a little more of my comfort zone ..." Her voice falters as she starts moving again.

They break through the underbrush, into the gravesite clearing.

"There's Professor Parry's dagger."  Water Princess's father walks over and picks it up. He frowns as he examines it. "Definitely not just a re-purposed letter opener. Can't leave it lying around."

"She would keep that in her desk and use it as a letter opener. She knows how to throw it, too, and just the thought of her having it handy kept some of the rowdier boys in line."

"Rather unique professor, I'd say."

助 -- We can take care of that.

Water Princess's father thoughtfully hands the dagger, handle first, to the messenger. The messenger accepts it, removes her pack, pulls a long cravat from it, and proceeds to wrap the dagger. Once the blade is protected, she stores it in her pack.

助 -- When necessary, the blade can be returned to any of you four.

観 -- Water Princess, what are your opinions of the work you have just done?

"If I had been more prepared, I think I'd have just asked the boars to handle it, and we could have watched from the shadows without having to assume any different form."

観 -- Do you think you could have been sufficiently prepared?

"Good question. I was just following the ideas that came to me, in my heart."

使 -- Could you have done better?

Water Princess and Earth Prince look at each other. Earth Prince shakes his head slowly.

"It's always possible to do better." Water Princess purses her lips thoughtfully.

"Until the job is done. It was sufficient," Earth Prince says with a wry smile.

使 -- Earth Prince is right. 

"And follow-up is always necessary, anyway." Water Princess nods in acceptance of her own words as she speaks.

助 -- To what object, the follow-up?

Water and Earth look at each other and nod, then speak in unison -- "To confirm Agnes's decision, and to try to help Professor Parry believe that magic is not the path she seeks."

助 -- Correct. You may now proceed with the business of the day.

"I have some questions."

観 -- Yes, Earth Prince?

"That was some pretty heavy-duty physics."

使 -- True.

I'm sure you share our amusement at Earth Prince's insight. Please be patient with him.

"Care to enlighten us how it was done? I mean, the one translation of matter forms is hard enough to understand being possible. It's way beyond simple alchemy--"

助 -- Very true.

"But, then, reversing it. Perfectly --"

観 -- You don't remember?

Earth Prince mulls this over. "Well, I remember bits and parts, but I was mostly leaving things up to my princess and hanging on for dear life. First time you know."

Water Princess blushes and looks aside. "It was my first time, too."

"I remember a kind of a bump when the entropy field turned sideways. Or was it we turned sideways in the field so we could have time to --" Earth Prince begins to turn pink around the base of his neck. "This feels just a little what it must feel like to have the family present on the wedding night."

使 -- So you could have time to what?

Water Princess's face turns bright red. Her parents smile patiently and nod.

Earth Prince swallows. "Scan all our grosser parts into storage in our finer matter memories."

観 -- Ah, those finer matter memories. Your scientists call it dark matter. How silly of them. All parts, as in?

"Everything from our backpacks and the clothes we are wearing to -- every part of our bodies, down to the cells and genetic material. Down to sub-atomic particles."

"I'm sorry, Ddaear."

"No one's to blame, Dŵr. It's not like we were looking at --" he pauses and they look into each other's eyes, "each other that way."

"Or like we'll be thinking that way about what we've seen."

There is an uncomfortable moment of silence.

"Should we keep not using each other's real names?"

"I still need the, uhm, safety zone, as long as we can keep it."

"Maybe I do, too."

観 -- Making babies may be one kind of intimacy, but not all intimacy is about making babies.

"That's a slippery slope." Earth Prince shakes his head. "I don't want to go there. Well, not today, not any more than we've been. It's hard enough knowing I've now seen more of my Princess than her doctor ever will."

"Me too," Water Princess mumbles.

"And your parents."

Water Princess's father clears his throat. "Well, speaking of relatives who were helping out, when you're handling so much of your own genetic material for the first time, it often helps to have close relatives who share the same genes helping you."

"Huh?"

助 -- 土母?

土母 -- Hi, hon.

"Mom?"

土父 -- Sorry we haven't able to be there the usual way, son. But we've been doing what we can from this side.

"Dad?"

Silence reigns in the forest, and after a few moments, Earth Prince raises his hand towards his father. His father takes his hand, and they embrace. Then Earth Prince embraces his mother. After another moment, Earth Prince pulls back.

"But, how? The second resurrection ...?"

土父 -- When you're called to a specific work, some exceptions may apply. 

"Can I tell Ceri?"

土母 -- Not yet, sweetheart. But she knows in her heart, anyway. Don't worry about it.

We stand aside as Earth Prince re-acquaints himself with his parents.

"Should we tell our princess that her grandparents were also here to help?"

"I know, Mom. We found a moment to talk in between moving data around."

---

Table of Contents

Next: Ancestors

---

[JMR2019: Backed up here:
https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/04/bk-we-0-13-70-debriefing.html
original back up here:
https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/03/bk-we-0-13-5-wild-boars.html
]

Water and Earth, Prologue, scene 13.60 -- To the Third and Fourth Generation

Previous: Wild Boars

Table of Contents

---

Now fully clothed, carrying the implements of their interrupted experiments, a sobered group of youths and one adult begins the hike out of the overgrown graveyard as the morning sun breaks into the clearing they are leaving behind.

"So, Nest, you saw stuff? Uhm, visions?" one of the girls asks the erstwhile sacrificial victim while pushing through the vines and undergrowth.

"Yeah, Enid. First it was the scary stuff you always see."

"Scary stuff?"

Wild boars can be very stealthy when they aren't announcing their presence. Four boars, whom we know, silently track the group.

"I guess that's all they're good at -- making scary faces and noises, flying around, talking about dying or --"

"Or?" Enid prompts.

Nesta stares at the ground. "Stupid stuff. Like rape. Except what they say doesn't really make sense. Or pretending to be my ancestors."

"Pretending to be?" the adult is puzzled. "Why do you say pretending?"

"My real great grandfather came and shooed all the fake ghosts away."

"Your great grandfather is dead," one of the boys points out as he holds tree limbs back so the rest can pass more easily.

"Of course, Alwyn. But there was a ghost pretending to be him, and a bunch of others pretending to be others. But it didn't feel real. I couldn't really believe it. Jut didn't feel right. Then when my real great grandfather came, I just knew."

"Knew him? How?" Alwyn is curious.

"I could tell. Among other things, he wasn't trying to scare me." Nesta pauses and thinks. "Or get me excited. There was something different."

"So you had a vision," another girl interjects. "I'm jealous!"

The whole group stops for a moment, looking expectantly at Nesta.

Nesta shakes her head. "It's not what you think, Efa."

We can see various expressions of puzzlement in their faces.

"We've been looking for magic. My grandfather told me we have all the magic we need inside ourselves."

The adult has stopped beside her. "All?"

"So how come I can't fly?"

"Why do you want to fly, Enid?"

"So I can fly out the window when maths get's boring."

Snickers circulate among the youths, and the adult sighs.

"What good would flying out the window do?"

"Be more interesting."

Murmurs of agreement.

"How about flying in your imagination?"

Murmurs of complaint.

The adult changes the subject. "You said I shouldn't let people define me. Why did you say that?"

Nesta turns to face her. "Professor Parry, my great grandfather showed me what he did to my grandmother. He said he had convinced himself he was trying to help her, but he was lying to himself. Then he showed me how she did much the same to my father, but worse, and then my father did it to me. Then he showed me some of what my mother and your mother did to you when you were a child."

Professor gasps, almost inaudibly, mumbling something.

"He said he was sorry. Said he really thought he was trying to help, but he messed up. And he said four generations repeating the same mistakes was four too many."

"You saw everything?"

"No, but I saw that they told you that you were to blame. That you were evil, so you didn't have any right to object. That you should like it because you were bad. You're not really a bad person, Professor Parry."

Professor Parry looks down, then starts moving forward. The rest of the group starts moving again.

"But it's too hard, being good," she complains in a low voice.

The students stop again, and Professor Parry proceeds a few more steps, then stops, holding a tree branch out of the way over her head as she  turns to face the students. "I don't think I want to be good."

Nesta and Professor Parry look into each other's eyes, each querying the other.

助 -- Maybe she is misunderstanding what good is?

"What is good?" Nesta asks.

One of the boys offers, "You've told us yourself a lot of the hard rules society makes are hard to follow because they aren't good."

"Llewellyn, did I really say that?"

"You told me I had to learn which rules were good for me, and how. And you said you were still trying to figure the rules out for yourself. That's why we came here today isn't it? We wanted to know whether magic is good or bad."

"So now we know it's not something to play with, I guess." Professor Parry turns around again and the group proceeds on their way through the thinning underbrush. "I did say that."

One of the girls adds, "We're trying to figure things out as we go along. And that means we're gonna make mistakes. It's what you say. That's what you tell us. Mistakes that don't kill aren't fatal."

"Bryn, you have no idea how hard it is to believe my own advice right now. My plan failed. And I could be disqualified from teaching, if people know what we've been doing."

Nesta shakes her head. "You didn't force any of us. Not really. And we learned something from it. I don't think it's a failure. Experiment with negative results, isn't it?"

Another boy volunteers, "And thanks to a bunch of wild boars, hey, nothing really happened today beyond a little drama practice. That's what I'm going to say it was, and it's pretty close to the truth. Right, Nest?"

Nods and murmurs of assent are exchanged as the group breaks through the trees onto a small path.

Nesta shrugs. "Yeah, Dylan, the boars were very helpful. I'm going to offer a quick prayer to whatever deity were watching out for us, in my heart. If you guys want to do that you can too. And then I'm getting back to real world."

The group pauses for a short minute or two of contemplation in their hearts, reaching in their own ways for communion, before heading in silent agreement down the path.

(Short minute — roughly twenty of your seconds. Sixteen hours to the day, sixteen long minutes to the hour, sixteen short minutes to the long minute. It is a coincidence that the Xhilran day is rather close to the same length as the day of your world, when comparing entropic rates.)

---

Table of Contents

Next: Debriefing

---

[JMR2019: Backed up here:
https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/04/bk-we-0-13-60-to-3rd-and-4th-generation.html
original backed up here:
https://joel-rees-economics.blogspot.com/2019/03/bk-we-0-13-5-wild-boars.html
]